Jamie Lynn Spears

Teen Mom

Marriage, Family & Relationships

“Me . . . A Mom? Growing up, did you imagine yourself as a mom? Did you plan for it, dream about it? Did you like the idea of having kids? I did. I loved kids, and I always thought I’d be a great mom, so why did I panic when I discovered my dream was coming true? Mostly because it was too soon. Way too soon. As a high schooler, I knew my life was about to change forever. And it did. My Story Each and every teen mom has her own story. Each and every teen mom has her own journey. My first child is twenty-five years old now, and I have a great, amazing life. But no matter what success I achieve, I’ll never forget the moment that I found out I was going to have a baby. Me? A mom? I’d always wanted a baby but never imagined it would happen at age seventeen. Like most little girls, I imagined marrying an amazing guy and becoming a mom. In bed at night, I’d let my mind wander. I pictured my future family. I wanted lots of kids, and I thought I’d be a good mom. Since I didn’t know my biological dad growing up — and my stepdad was distant and unconcerned about me — I wanted a husband who really cared about me and my kids. I wanted to be a teacher, but I don’t remember anyone talking to me about college. I got good grades, but there was so much happening in everyday life that I didn’t really look ahead. From a young age, I was obsessed with boys. I remember having crushes beginning in the fourth grade. I wasn’t pretty, and I was awkward. Another young woman, Kendra,2 found out she was pregnant when she went into the emergency room and discovered she was in labor. Talk about the shock of your life! Then there are those who are happy about being pregnant, like Kayleigh. When she was only fifteen, she wanted to have a baby. For most of her life, Kayleigh had been sexually abused. Her innocence had been taken away, and she wanted to get away from the situation. She thought expecting a baby would solve everything. She and her boyfriend could get their own place, and they could start their own family. So she was thrilled to discover she was pregnant. No matter how you found out, no matter what others thought about your pregnancy, there is one thing that all of us have in common — our lives changed. We had to think of someone other than ourselves. We had to learn how to deal with all the changes. We lost friends, and sadly, we were seen by many as simply a statistic. Everyone has an opinion about teen pregnancy. Some people see it as a problem. Some see it as an obstacle or a hinderance to teens’ future. Shows like MTV’s Teen Mom give people a glimpse into teen pregnancy, but their story is not ours. You are not a statistic. Your child is not a statistic. Your future has just as many possibilities the day after you discover that you are a pregnant teen as it did the day before. I’ll be the first to tell you that life will be harder. There are more challenges. But your life can be just as good. Things Change When you find out you’re pregnant, things change. Maybe your parents are angry; maybe they’re excited. Maybe your boyfriend is excited. Maybe he’s angry. Some teen moms stay in school and work hard to do their best, but others decide that they can’t handle one more thing and drop out of school. Some teens get support from their parents. Others get kicked out of their homes. ‘Okay, I will.’ We were filling up with gas, so I went in the gas station and took the test and it was positive,” she recalls. “So that is the glamorous way that I found out I was going to have my little nugget!”